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THE ONLY REVOLUTION INDIA PART 15/《唯一的革命》 印度 第十五篇

THE ONLY REVOLUTION INDIA PART 15
《唯一的革命》 印度 第十五篇

That morning the river was tarnished silver, for it was cloudy and cold. The leaves were covered with dust, and everywhere there was a thin layer of it - in the room, on the veranda and on the chair. It was getting colder; it must have snowed heavily in the Himalayas; one could feel the biting wind from the north, even the birds were aware of it. But the river that morning had a strange movement of its own; it didn't seem to be ruffled by the wind, it seemed almost motionless and had that timeless quality which all waters seem to have. How beautiful it was! No wonder people have made it into a sacred river. You could sit there, on that veranda, and meditatively watch it endlessly. You weren't day-dreaming; your thoughts weren't in any direction - they were simply absent.

那天早上,河水被染成了黯淡的银色,因为天气多云而寒冷。树叶被尘土覆盖着,到处都有薄薄的一层灰尘——房间里,走廊里和椅子上。天气越来越冷;喜马拉雅山上肯定已经下过了大雪;你能感觉到刺骨的北风,连鸟儿们都觉察到了这点。但是那天早上河水有着它自己奇特的一种运动;它似乎没有被风吹皱,看起来几乎一动不动,有着所有水体似乎都具有的那种永恒品质。多美啊!难怪人们把它当作圣河。你可以坐在那儿,在阳台上一直冥想地看着它。你不是在做白日梦;你的思绪没有处于任何方向——它们只是不存在。

    And as you watched the light on that river, somehow you seemed to lose yourself, and as you closed your eyes there was a penetration into a void that was full of blessing. This was bliss. He came again that morning, with a young man. He was the monk who had talked about discipline, sacred books and the authority of tradition. His face was freshly washed, and so were his robes. The young man seemed rather nervous. He had come with the monk, who was probably his guru, and was waiting for him to speak first. He looked at the river but he was thinking of other things. Presently the sannyasi said:

当你看着那水面上的光,不知为什么你似乎忘却了自己,当你闭上眼睛,好像穿透了充满着祝福的一片虚空。这就是极乐。那天早上他又来了,和一个年轻人一起。他是那位谈起过戒律、圣书和传统权威的僧人。他的脸刚刚洗过,袍子也一样。那个年轻人看起来相当紧张。他和那位也许是他的古鲁的僧人同来,等着他先开口说话。他看着那条河,但是在想着别的事情。很快那位僧人说:

    "I have come again but this time to talk about love and sensuality. We, who have taken the vow of chastity, have our sensuous problems. The vow is only a means of resisting our uncontrollable desires. I am an old man now, and these desires no longer burn me. Before I took the vows I was married. My wife died, and I left my home and went through a period of agony, of intolerable biological urges; I fought them night and day. It was a very difficult time, full of loneliness, frustration, fears of madness, and neurotic outbursts. Even now I daren't think about it too much. And this young man has come with me because I think he is going through the same problem. He wants to give up the world and take the vow of poverty and chastity, as I did. I have been talking to him for many weeks, and I thought it might be worthwhile if we could both talk over this problem with you, this problem of sex and love. I hope you don't mind if we talk quite frankly."

“我又来了,但是这次来谈谈爱和性欲。我们已经宣誓守贞,但也有着感官欲望的问题。誓言只是抗拒我们无法控制的欲望的方法。现在我是个老人了,这些欲望不再煎熬我。在我宣誓前,我已经结婚了。我妻子死了,然后我离开了自己的家,经历了一个生理冲动难以遏制的痛苦阶段;我日夜与之交战。那是一段非常艰难的时间,充满了孤独、沮丧、对疯掉的恐惧和神经质的爆发。关于那段时间,即使现在我都不敢想太多。而这个年轻人和我一起来到这里,是因为我认为他在经历同样的问题。他想弃世并宣誓安贫守贞,就像我一样。我已经跟他谈了好几个星期,我想也许值得我们一起来和你谈谈这个问题,这个性和爱的问题。我希望你不介意我们非常坦率地谈一谈。”

    If we are going to concern ourselves with this matter, first, if we may suggest it, don't start to examine from a position, or an attitude, or a principle, for this will prevent you from exploration. If you are against sex, or if you insist that it is necessary to life, that it is a part of living, any such assumption will prevent real perception. We should put away any conclusion, and so be free to look, to examine.

如果我们自己要关注这个问题,首先,如果我们可以建议的话,请不要从某个立场、态度或原则开始来审视,因为这会妨碍你进行探索。如果你反对性,或者你坚持性在生活中是必要的、是生存的一部分,那么任何此类假设都会妨碍真正的洞察。我们应该把一切结论都抛开,这样就能自由地去看、去检验。

    There were a few drops of rain now, and the birds had become quiet, for it was going to rain heavily, and the leaves once again would be fresh and green, full of light and colour. There was a smell of rain, and the strange quietness that comes before a storm was on the land.

现在下了几滴雨,鸟儿们安静下来,因为将会有场大雨,树叶又会变得清新翠绿,充盈着光和色彩。有种雨的味道,在暴雨降临大地之前,有种不寻常的安静。

    So we have two problems - love and sex. The one is an abstract idea, the other is an actual daily biological urge - a fact that exists and cannot be denied. Let us first find out what love is, not as an abstract idea but what it actually is. What is it? Is it merely a sensuous delight, cultivated by thought as pleasure, the remembrance of an experience which has given great delight or sexual enjoyment? Is it the beauty of a sunset, or the delicate leaf that you touch or see, or the perfume of the flower that you smell? Is love pleasure, or desire? Or is it none of these? Is love to be divided as the sacred and the profane? Or is it something indivisible, whole, that cannot be broken up by thought? Does it exist without the object? Or does it come into being only because of the object? Is it because you see the face of a woman that love arises in you - love then being sensation, desire, pleasure, to which thought gives continuity? Or is love a state in you which responds to beauty as tenderness? Is love something cultivated by thought so that its object becomes important, or is it utterly unrelated to thought and, therefore, independent, free? Without understanding this word and the meaning behind it we shall be tortured, or become neurotic about sex, or be enslaved by it.

那么我们有两个问题——爱和性。其一是个抽象的概念,另一个是一种实际的日常生理冲动——一个存在着的无法被否认的事实。我们首先来弄清爱是什么,不是一个抽象的概念而是爱实际上是什么。它是什么?它是否仅仅是一种被思想培育成快乐的感官愉悦,以及对一种带来过巨大欢愉或性享受的经验的记忆?它是不是一次日落或者你触到或看到的一片嫩叶的美,或者你嗅到的一朵花的芬芳?爱是快乐或欲望吗?抑或这些都不是?爱能被划分为神圣的和世俗的吗?抑或它是完整而不可分的,无法被思想分裂开来?它是否不需要对象而存在?还是它只为某个对象而产生?是不是因为你看到了一个女人的脸庞,爱就在你心中产生了?——那么爱就变成了感官感受、欲望和快乐,而思想为之赋予了延续性。抑或爱是你以温柔来回应美的一种状态?爱是不是思想培育出的东西,因而它的对象变得重要,还是它与思想完全无关,因而是独立的、自由的?如果不了解这个词及其背后的含义,我们就会受折磨,或对爱变得神经质,或者被它奴役。

    Love is not to be broken up into fragments by thought. When thought breaks it up into fragments, as impersonal, personal, sensuous, spiritual, my country and your country, my god and your god, then it is no longer love, then it is something entirely different - a product of memory, of propaganda, of convenience, of comfort and so on.

爱不会被思想分裂成碎片。当思想把它分裂成非个人的、个人的、感官刺激的、精神的、我的国家和你的国家、我的神和你的神这些碎片,那么它就不再是爱了,它就变成了截然不同的东西——记忆、宣传、方便和舒适等等的产物。

    Is sex the product of thought? Is sex - the pleasure, the delight, the companionship, the tenderness involved in it - is this a remembrance strengthened by thought? In the sexual act there is self-forgetfulness, self-abandonment, a sense of the non-existence of fear, anxiety, the worries of life. Remembering this state of tenderness and self-forgetfulness, and demanding its repetition, you chew over it, as it were, until the next occasion. Is this tenderness, or is it merely a recollection of something that is over and which, through repetition, you hope to capture again? Is not the repetition of something, however pleasurable, a destructive process?

性是思想的产物吗?性是不是——其中涉及的快乐、愉悦、陪伴和温存——这是不是被思想强化的一种回忆?性行为中有自我忘怀、自我摒弃,还有一种生活的恐惧、焦虑、担忧都不存在了的感觉。记着这种温柔和自我忘怀的状态并想要再重复,你回味它当时发生的情景,直到下次再次发生。这是温柔吗,还是只是对结束了的事情的追忆,通过重复你希望再次捕捉到?对某事的重复,不管多么愉快,难道不是一个破坏性的过程吗?

    The young man suddenly found his tongue: "Sex is a biological urge, as you yourself have said, and if this is destructive then isn't eating equally destructive, because that also is a biological urge?"

那个年轻人突然开口了:“性是一种生理冲动,就像你所说的,如果这是破坏性的,那么难道吃东西不也一样有破坏性吗,因为那也是生理冲动?

    If one eats when one is hungry - that is one thing. If one is hungry and thought says: "I must have the taste of this or that type of food" - then it is thought, and it is this which is the destructive repetition.

如果一个人在饿的时候吃东西——那是一回事。如果一个人饿了,而思想说:“我必须品尝这种或那种类型的食物“——那么那就是思想,而这正是破坏性的重复。

    "In sex, how do you know what is the biological urge, like hunger, and what a psychological demand, like greed?" asked the young man.

“在性里面,你怎么知道什么是生理冲动,像饥饿一样,什么是心理需求,像贪婪一样?”年轻人问。

    Why do you divide the biological urge and the psychological demand? And there is yet another question, a different question altogether - why do you separate sex from seeing the beauty of a mountain or the loveliness of a flower? Why do you give such tremendous importance to the one and totally neglect the other?

你为什么要划分出生理冲动和心理需求?还有另一个问题,一个完全不同的问题——你为什么把性和看到一座山的美或一朵花的可爱分离开来?你为什么把其中之一看得如此重要,却完全忽略另一个?

    "If sex is something quite different from love, as you seem to say, then is there any necessity at all to do anything about sex?" asked the young man.

“如果性是与爱截然不同的东西,就像你似乎说的那样,那么究竟还有必要对性做些什么吗?”年轻人问道。

    We have never said that love and sex are two separate things. We have said that love is whole, not to be broken up, and thought, by its very nature, is fragmentary. When thought dominates, obviously there is no love. Man generally knows - perhaps only knows - the sex of thought, which is the chewing of the cud of pleasure and its repetition. Therefore we have to ask: Is there any other kind of sex which is not of thought or desire?

我们从没说过爱和性是分开的两件事情。我们说的是,爱是完整的、不可分割的,而思想究其本质,是支离破碎的。当思想占了主导,显然就没有了爱。人通常知道——或许只知道——思想中的性,也就是咀嚼快乐的残渣和重复快乐。因此我们不得不问:到底有没有一种性不属于思想或者欲望?

    The sannyasi had listened to all this with quiet attention. Now he spoke: "I have resisted it, I have taken a vow against it, because by tradition, by reason, I have seen that one must have energy for the religious dedicated life. But I now see that this resistance has taken a great deal of energy. I have spent more time on resisting, and wasted more energy on it, than I have ever wasted on sex itself. So what you have said - that a conflict of any kind is a waste of energy - I now understand. Conflict and struggle are far more deadening than the seeing of a woman's face, or even perhaps than sex itself."

那位僧人安静而关注地听了这番对话。现在他说:“我抗拒过它,我宣过誓反抗它,因为依照传统和理性,我发现一个人必须为虔诚的宗教生活保存能量。但是我现在看到这种抗拒消耗了大量的能量。比起为性本身所浪费的时间和能量,我花去了更多的时间用来抗拒,并为此浪费了更多的能量。所以你所说的——任何冲突都是能量的浪费——我现在理解了。冲突和挣扎比看到一个女人的脸,甚至也许比性本身要致命得多。

    Is there love without desire, without pleasure? Is there sex, without desire, without pleasure? Is there love which is whole, without thought entering into it? Is sex something of the past, or is it something each time new? Thought is obviously old, so we are always contrasting the old and the new. We are asking questions from the old, and we want an answer in terms of the old. So when we ask: Is there sex without the whole mechanism of thought operating and working, doesn't it mean that we have not stepped out of the old? We are so conditioned by the old that we do not feel our way into the new. We said love is whole, and always new - new not as opposed to the old, for that again is the old. Any assertion that there is sex without desire is utterly valueless, but if you have followed the whole meaning of thought, then perhaps you will come upon the other. If, however, you demand that you must have your pleasure at any price, then love will not exist.

是否存在没有欲望、没有享乐的爱?是否存在没有欲望、没有享乐的性?是否存在完整的爱,没有思想涉足其中?性是过去的事情,还是每次都是崭新的?思想显然是老旧的,所以我们总是把旧的和新的对比。我们从陈旧中提出问题,想要从旧有的角度得到一个回答。所以当我们问:是否存在没有思想的整个机制在运转和工作的性,那难道不意味着我们还没有从陈旧中走出来吗?我们如此受制于陈旧,以至于摸不到进入崭新的路。我们说爱是完整的,总是新鲜的——新不是旧的反面,因为那样就还是旧的。任何对存在没有欲望的性的断言,都是毫无价值的,但是如果你了解了思想的全部含义,那么也许你就能遭遇另一个。然而,如果你想要那个,你就必然会不惜一切代价来获取快乐,那么爱就不会存在。

    The young man said: "That biological urge you spoke about is precisely such a demand, for though it may be different from thought it engenders thought." "Perhaps I can answer my young friend," said the sannyasi, "for I have been through all this. I have trained myself for years not to look at a woman. I have ruthlessly controlled the biological demand. The biological urge does not engender thought; thought captures it, thought utilizes it, thought makes images, pictures out of this urge - and then the urge is a slave to thought. It is thought which engenders the urge so much of the time. As I said, I am beginning to see the extraordinary nature of our own deception and dishonesty. There is a great deal of hypocrisy in us. We can never see things as they are but must create illusions about them. What you are telling us, sir, is to look at everything with clear eyes, without the memory of yesterday; you have repeated this so often in your talks. Then life does not become a problem. In my old age I am just beginning to realize this."

年轻人说:“你说到的那生理冲动确实就是这样一种需求,因为尽管它也许不同于思想,但是它会引发思想。”“或许我可以回答我这位年轻的朋友,”那位僧人说,“因为我经历过这一切。我多年来一直训练自己不去看女人。我无情地控制着生理冲动。生理冲动并不引发思想;思想捕捉它,思想利用它,思想从这冲动中制造意象、画面——于是这冲动就成为了思想的奴隶。绝大部分时间是思想引发了冲动。正如我所说,我开始看到我们自欺和不诚实的惊人本质。我们身上有大量的虚伪。我们永远无法如实地看到事物本身,而是必然制造关于它们的幻象。你告诉我们的是,用清澈的眼睛去看一切,而不带着昨天的记忆;你在讲话里再三重复这点。那么生命就不会变成一个问题。在我的晚年,我才开始意识到这一点。”

    The young man looked not completely satisfied. He wanted life according to his terms, according to the formula which he had carefully built.

年轻人看起来并不完全满意。他想要按照自己的要求、自己精心搭建的模式来生活。

    This is why it is very important to know oneself, not according to any formula or according to any guru. This constant choiceless awareness ends all illusions and all hypocrisy.

这就是为什么不按照任何模式或遵照任何古鲁来了解自己很重要。这种不停的无选择的觉察终结了所有幻觉和所有虚伪。

    Now it was coming down in torrents, and the air was very still, and there was only the sound of the rain on the roof and on the leaves.

现在河水奔流而下,而空气中却非常寂静,只有房顶上和树叶上的雨声。

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